- 2014 resolution: don't fuck it up
going back to school after a break is like when you pause a video game to go pee and when you come back you forget how intense and chaotic everything was when you paused it and the second you unpause it all your enemies collectively punch you in the face
2014 goal: party like a hobbit but look like an elf
drink like a dwarf
fight like a man
smoke like a wizard
hoard gold like a dragon
WHAT THE FUCK
she had period and the blood attracted the damned shark OMG THAT’S BEST AD EVER
That escalated quickly.
At first I was like: Oh. Okay, look… sexy ladies.
But then I was like: Oh. Oh my.
if you’re a female and this scenario doesn’t cross your mind at least once every summer, you must be either under the age of like 12 or older than 50
My roommate said “WHAT COUNTRY IS THAT COMMERCIAL FROM” and my other two roommates just said “Probably Australia” in unison
I love him because he’s the only one in their lives to call their bullshit
basically saying what we’re all thinking
I love Scott